Friday, February 15, 2013

Can You Be Good and Do a Bad Thing?

I have spent the last seven months marinating in infidelity - as a writer. My next book, "Being Good," explores the idea of whether or not you can be a good person, but make a bad choice... Can you?


I interviewed people and have done a lot of research about infidelity, and what I have come to believe, save the random sociopath who has no moral compass, is that most people are good, and that cheating is a symptom of a relationship that isn't working, and of being unhappy. No one can "steal:' your husband or wife, boyfriend or girlfriend, if someone is happy and healthy where they are they are very unlikely to cheat.

What I learned is that good people do indeed sometimes make bad choices, and I don't think that makes them bad people. Is it ever a good thing? That's hard to say. Sometimes an affair is the catalyst to get you out of an unhappy marriage, and sometimes it makes you see you have too much to lose.

It was an interesting topic to explore and write about. It's certainly one that evokes a lot of discussion amongst people...I have been privy to some pretty passionate thoughts on the subject!

Would I cheat on someone? I never have and don't see that as very likely. It is a choice, nothing "just happens" as the man in my life often says. At some point you have to consciously decide to take that road. But, given the ingredients of a relationship that isn't working, I posit that none of us is immune...

I look forward to "Being Good:" being published and seeing what the world thinks... I'm sure I will hear a lot about it.

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