Thursday, August 11, 2011

My Love/Hate Relationship With Feminism


I was reading a piece on Jezebel today about the continued ongoing debate about the word "feminism" and its meaning.

It seems all these years out from the '60s and '70s that the debate would be over - we all deserve to be treated with respect and deserve equal pay and opportunity. Sounds simple enough to me.

For me where it all gets a little fuzzy is who and what we're expected to be.

I talked with someone today, someone who didn't really know me and I could tell they formed opinions immediately based on the dress and heels I was wearing. I know the askance look well -the, "She's blond and she's wearing girly clothes," for some this equates into not being taken seriously and being dumb.

It's the same snap judgement I observed when my younger son had dreadlocks and people assumed he was a thug - not an honor role-achieving, captain of the football team and all-around good kid.

I'm as ambitious as they come. I'm not in your face about it, but make no mistake - even in high heels I have career goals I am intent on achieving. That said, I am equally passionate about caring for the people I love, which is where I sometimes fall out of line with my feminist comrades.

See, I like to cook, bake, knit and yes, enjoy my feminine side. I find nothing hypocritical about enjoying being domestic, sexy AND being ambitious, but that seems hard for some to wrap their brains around. I happen to believe these don't need to be mutually exclusive.

I also happen to believe there is nothing more potent than a woman who is comfortable in her own skin - doing whatever it is they love with passion.

My dream is that at some point women will be in each others' corners and not at each others' throats judging and critiquing.

Life's hard enough, especially if you're trying to navigate it in heels.


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